Awakening
Every night I rock you to sleep. We read books and sing. When you're really tired you giggle....constantly. It is the most adorable thing. I can kiss your neck and you giggle, your hands, your tummy it doesn't matter, each kiss receives a gale of hysterical giggles - it's a little game to you. You pretend to push me away and then you stretch out inviting me to kiss you more. Then when you're tired finally, you kiss my face, put your thumb in your mouth, and close your eyes.I lay you down you grab your blanket and smile the most heartbreakingly beautiful smile I've ever seen.
And, every single night I thank God for you, Natalie.
You are such a glorious blessing. You have softened our hearts and made us realize how quickly life passes by and how important it is to pursue nothing but love and happiness every second.
Nothing else matters.
As blessed as I always feel, I have never felt more thankful or more blessed than the moment I saw your face Saturday afternoon.
Saturday was truly the worst day I have ever experienced in my career. I have never seen or been a part of anything so heart breaking or gut wrenching. I hope never, ever to experience such a calamity again.
I have experienced loss and understood the delicacy of life. I have been hurt.
I have been afraid and I have cried.
I have never felt those things the way I did on Saturday though.
It shook me to the very core of my soul.
The only thing keeping me steady my short drive home was thinking of you and your Daddy.
How much I love you both, how happy you make me, how blessed I feel every day.
I felt so guilty knowing that I was going home to hug you both and tell you both how much I love you when there are some who will never have that opportunity. But all I wanted to do was see your faces and hold you both. To know you were safe. We were safe for that moment.
I feel so sad for the mothers who are never able to hold their children and are never able to fully experience the joy a child brings to life. I don't believe I will ever forget this experience. To be honest, as terrible as it was, I hope never to forget. I hope that not a single moment ever goes by where I have forgotten how blessed that I am to hold you, to hug you, and to love you.
Every day when I wake up and see your smiling face, I thank God that I am able to do that.
If there is ever a day when I am not able to, I truly hope you and your Daddy both know what an amazing life I have with you both in it. I hope one day you will understand how no matter what else I may do in life, you are the most important things in my world.
I could never love more than I love the two of you.
I live to love you both....
My life could never be more full or joyous any other way.
And, every single night I thank God for you, Natalie.
You are such a glorious blessing. You have softened our hearts and made us realize how quickly life passes by and how important it is to pursue nothing but love and happiness every second.
Nothing else matters.
As blessed as I always feel, I have never felt more thankful or more blessed than the moment I saw your face Saturday afternoon.
Saturday was truly the worst day I have ever experienced in my career. I have never seen or been a part of anything so heart breaking or gut wrenching. I hope never, ever to experience such a calamity again.
I have experienced loss and understood the delicacy of life. I have been hurt.
I have been afraid and I have cried.
I have never felt those things the way I did on Saturday though.
It shook me to the very core of my soul.
The only thing keeping me steady my short drive home was thinking of you and your Daddy.
How much I love you both, how happy you make me, how blessed I feel every day.
I felt so guilty knowing that I was going home to hug you both and tell you both how much I love you when there are some who will never have that opportunity. But all I wanted to do was see your faces and hold you both. To know you were safe. We were safe for that moment.
I feel so sad for the mothers who are never able to hold their children and are never able to fully experience the joy a child brings to life. I don't believe I will ever forget this experience. To be honest, as terrible as it was, I hope never to forget. I hope that not a single moment ever goes by where I have forgotten how blessed that I am to hold you, to hug you, and to love you.
Every day when I wake up and see your smiling face, I thank God that I am able to do that.
If there is ever a day when I am not able to, I truly hope you and your Daddy both know what an amazing life I have with you both in it. I hope one day you will understand how no matter what else I may do in life, you are the most important things in my world.
I could never love more than I love the two of you.
I live to love you both....
My life could never be more full or joyous any other way.
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